College, sweet college


Diary of a liver out 300x200Sometimes a change of scenery can be nice when living out. In my case, it’s essential. For reasons that I won’t go into (because they’re boring and complicated) I have moved out of my house and am now living in college again. I wasn’t given a choice in the matter, but then who really wants to live in a building site anyway? Not me. I know I’ve made the right decision because whenever I speak to any friends about the situation they gasp sympathetically and agree that they would have done exactly the same thing. (A side note for terrified freshers: my situation, while completely bonkers, is probably the least likely thing that will ever happen to you when you live out. Don’t panic.)

I have mixed feelings about living in college. On the one hand, I’m incredibly relieved and grateful that I have a place to stay at all; but on the other hand, another year of potato-based meals, dodgy plumbing and 3am fire alarms stretches ahead of me. Perhaps, though, I can instil a little of my college know-how on the poor innocent freshers, so that they aren’t quite as clueless as I was a year ago (I once had to ask someone how to lock my door in first term)

I would help the freshers, if they’d shut up for five minutes. Bless their little hearts, they have clearly never lived in shared accommodation before, least of all with neighbours who like to do normal things like working in the day and sleeping at night. All day and most of the night I am constantly serenaded by a cacophony of slamming doors, shouted conversations, and an odd screaming noise that the plumbing makes whenever someone uses a tap (which, if you ever wondered, is about once every 5 minutes, or about how long it takes you to just drift off to sleep and be woken up again)

I must admit, living in college does have its up sides, for all that most livers in love to grumble about it. I constantly bump into people who I would never otherwise see when I’m living in a house; sometimes, when living out, I would go several days simply going from house to lectures to Tesco and back, with no college meals for socialising. College is also pleasantly warm, unlike our house, where we kept the heating on at a bare minimum, just enough that none of us actually got hypothermia. The packed lunches are a bonus, too; long days in the laboratory fly by knowing that at least I didn’t have to put time or effort into making sandwiches the night before… and also that I probably have a proper Kit Kat for a snack, when as a penniless liver out I couldn’t even afford Aldi’s own brand knock-offs.

Protips for livers in AND out this week:

  • Livers in: Don’t be shy! Go and visit your friends in their new houses and you can either be overcome by paroxysms of jealousy over how independent they are, or secretly laugh at their small house-related misfortunes (depending on how nice you are feeling)
  • Livers out: Consider inviting all of your liver in friends round to dinner to spare them the horrors of college food for yet another night.
  • One more for livers in: Get to know the freshers! They are actually lovely, and also once you’re friends with them it makes it a lot easier to politely let them know that they’re being too noisy.


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