Ideas for successful “unforeseen circumstance” forms

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It appears a new dawn is upon those whose contact with lecturers is limited to emails with the subject line “Family emergency – Requesting extension”. The university must be fed up with the sheer number of grandparents passing away this term and asked what they could do to help aid this crisis. 

The solution? Raise the standards for what constitutes a valid reason for an extension to be granted. Now, I personally feel the new language of “unforeseen circumstances” is quite vague. Anything can be a circumstance and burying your head in the sand makes it unforeseen. I have compiled a list, non-exhaustive of course, of crises I believe fulfil this new criteria:

– Housemate gets dumped by a 5’9 rugby boy who feels he’s not “getting the full uni experience” because he had to miss a social on her birthday. Sure, he only ever messaged her past 11 pm and refused to take her out to dinner, but heartbreak is heartbreak nonetheless and calls for several nights of drinking wine listening to Taylor Swift.

– Aga requires all house heating leaving rooms frigid and fingers numb. How is one meant to type if fingertips are blue? Some may call this irresponsible but the arctic temperatures are well worth the salmon eggs benedict to be devoured come morning.

The university must be fed up with the sheer number of grandparents passing away this term and asked what they could do to help aid this crisis

– New Mini-Ultra Platform Uggs inadequate for flooding streets. Hearts of many were in the right place in making the long trek to the Billy B for a long evening shift. But what was meant to be an immensely productive session resulted in everyone’s favourite boots getting soaked, muddy, and ultimately: unrecognisable. Understandably distraught, girls rushed home to look up possible remedies, far too grief-stricken over the loss of their latest Christmas gifts to even contemplate writing their summatives.

– Mistaken Daunt Books tote bag leaves Geography student with Philosophy readings. The green bag is notorious for a reason: spacious, stylish, and morally superior to any and all backpacks, there’s a reason it comes standard with an LNER ticket from King’s Cross to Durham. But a mix-up while waiting for flat whites in the Billy B Café leaves two students stranded. How were they supposed to see past the Acne Studios multi-coloured scarfs to see it was not their Political Geography reading inside, but an edition of The Crito? Needless to say two emotionally apologetic emails will be sent out tonight – from phones of course, MacBooks are in the wind.

Image: Marco Verch via Flickr

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